Much thanks to Jessica d’Arbonne at The Examiner

At this time I must take a break from my regularly scheduled zombie reporting to address a very serious issue in the study of creatures of the night: Vampires. Due to the publication of several works of fiction marketed to young girls, Americans (even enlightened Denver natives) are living under the mistaken assumption that vampires pose no threat to human life. This is false. Vampires, like zombies, are a scourge on the face of humanity.


Recent propaganda has suggested that vampires–traditionally villainous blood sucking demons intent on despoiling the innocent–are in fact cuddly, misunderstood heart-throbs. Nothing could be further from the truth. Vampires are not to be trifled with. Do not invite them into your home. Do not offer them your blood. And certainly do not allow them to date your teenage daughter.

Read More here

Ha! I love this! And it’s a very good point, with vampires being undead and all.

Would you let your friend date a vampire?