Lost Girl
Season Two, Episode 12
Original Air date: 4/2/2012
(Dis)Members Only

Brought to you by OBS reviewer Nakeesha J. Seneb

Dyson is planning a well-deserved, solo vacation when Bo comes up and invites herself. Like Kenzi and Hale, we can never tell when those two or on or off. But I guess this is an on week.

We cut to a dude clipping a leaf off a tree with huge hedge clippers. He doesn’t look like he’s right in the head. Then he gets clobbered in the head by a rock. Vines come out of nowhere, wrap around his body, and take him away.

Bo and Dyson are in the tub trying to choose a vacay spot when Kenzi interrupts. There’s a client that needs a consult. This client, Neville’s his name, is an old friend of Kenzi from her street days as Meow Meow. Neville is an illegal worker who works in the kitchen at a country club where “a lot of weird stuff goes on.” His friend, Thumper, who used to work on the grounds has disappeared. Bo and Kenzi take the case and then head back to the tub to illicit Dyson to come along on the undercover mission as Bo’s husband.

At the Country Club, Bo has to work her magic on the club’s manager, Mitch, to get herself and Dyson an immediate membership. Once inside, the pair head to the tennis courts and purposefully bump into Blake, the club’s resident gossip.

Meanwhile, Kenzi is in the kitchen where she’s posing as an undocumented, Venezuelan waitress. The chef cares less about her immigration status and more about Kenzi trying to sneak the food. The chef, Amy, warns her that eating the food is a fireable offense. Later, Kenzi accidentally spills a drink on the manager’s wife, Chloe. It earns her a strike.

We cut to Blake, now drunk, running in the garden after having lunch with Bo and Dyson. Chloe approaches and they two discuss board membership. Chloe is not pleased when Blakes insists she won’t play nice if elected. At that, Chloe swings her golf club at the woman saying, “She’s all yours.” That same vine comes out and takes Blake away.

Bo and Dyson are back at the loft making out. Kenzi enters, freaking out about her strike  and tells them that the grounds keeper, who is creepy, warned her that she’s in trouble. Kenzi’s also seen that there is actually a strike list and workers have X’s next to their names. Thumper was on that list. For her hard work, Dyson gives Kenzi a foot massage, jealous much! Bo and Dyson plan to crash an exclusive party being held at the club tonight. But first, Bo tells Dyson that she loves that he can’t lie to her. Hmmm… Hale arrives as the two are getting ready for the party. He’s done some recon on the club members’ bank accounts. Seems they all ran into fortune after becoming members. There’s a knock at the door. Bo goes to answer. It’s Saskia and she’s ready for a night out. Hmmm….When Saskia sees Dyson, she calls Bo the lamest succubus in history for having a steady. Once Saskia is gone, Bo lies to Dyson about who was at the door.

At the club, it’s not your standard scotch tasting going on. It’s a nudist, swinger’s club. Bo and Dyson try to grill Chloe and Mitch, but chef Amy arrives with food fresh from the garden that everyone insists is to die for. As others begin to get amorous, Dyson wants to call it an early night. Bo is annoyed, or turned on at their departure. She says she’s mad that Dyson blew a chance to get more information for the case.

Meanwhile, Kenzi and Hale infiltrate Mitch’s office. They gripe about having to do all the grunt work while Bo and Dyson get all the glory. They find more details about the club members’ success. Kenzi finds another record of strike marks. She has two. No one has more than three. The creepy grounds keeper pokes his head in the door. Kenzi and Hale duck under the desk. Hale tries to make a move, but she insists it’s not a sexy, undercover moment.

Back at the loft, Dyson insists he doesn’t want to share Bo and that monogamy is not in her nature. But she doesn’t stop him from howling at the moon, does she? Dyson contends he’s not about to change her, that he’s hers, and wolves mate for life. Bo’s not making any promises, but she thinks that if they stay honest they’ll have a chance. The next morning, Dyson goes to Trick and demands they tell Bo everything.

With the gang all together, Kenzi’s freaking out about her strikes; Dyson learns he’s got a 10% bump at work; and Blake is missing. While walking the grounds of the country club, Dyson and Bo stumble upon a lottery ticket worth $25K. The creepy grounds keeper is slinking around and they take off after him. They find a vat of remains with pieces of Blake, Thumper, other humans and something fae.

Bo now decides to take the direct approach. She and Dyson corner Mitch and she uses her wiles to get him to answer her questions. Only he’s clueless about how the magic works. He only knows something feeds off of the sacrifices and the victims’ deaths benefit their society. Bo and Dyson assume it’s a dark fae, which means Dyson can’t go any further.

Bo and Dyson take a sample of the stew to Trick for analysis. Trick determines it’s a Land White, a shifting, nature fae that brings prosperity to anything that eats its by-product. Yeah, fae poop. Bo and Kenzi think the Land White is the grounds keeper. Kenzi quickly learns it’s not when she’s cornered in the kitchen by Chef Amy. Instead of Bo killing the dark fae, the human cavalry arrive –all the immigrants who were marked for slaughter. Later, Bo gives the lottery ticket to Thumper’s parents.

Dyson prepares to tell Bo everything that night, then Saskia shows up and attacks him with a soul-sucking kiss. Bo arrives and stabs Saskia -who survives. Bo’s more interested in Dyson who is convulsing on the floor. In a twist of magic, Bo is able to give him energy and he comes back. His last words before the fade to black, “Bo, I’m so sorry.”