“Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” – “It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains. Never was this truth more plain than during the recent attack at Netherfield Park, in which a household of 18 was slaughtered and consumed by a horde of the living dead.”
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“Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” – “Darcy had never been so bewitched by any woman as he was by her. He really believed, that were it not for the inferiority of her connections, he should be in some danger of falling in love, and were it not for his considerable skill in the deadly arts, that he should be in danger of being bested by hers – for never had he seen a lady more gifted in the ways of vanquishing the undead.”
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“Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters” – “The family of Dashwood had been settled in Sussex since before the Alteration, when the waters of the world grew cold and hateful to the sons of man, and darkness moved on the face of the deep.”
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Mr. Darcy lets Lizzie in on his secret in “Mr. Darcy, Vampyre” – “I thought that as long as I didn’t bite you that you would never turn, and that I could hide my nature from you; that we could live together at Pemberley and that you need never know. But then I found out on our wedding day that there was a chance, just a chance, that I would turn you if I claimed you, that you might become a vampyre if I truly made you my wife.”
These excerpts crack me up. The concepts don’t seem to go together but they’re funny.
Have you read any of these? Do you like them? Why?